my homescreen feels so lonely without you

God I miss tumblr. I have these itches to post but no, I said I was going on a social media blackout (with the exception of WordPress thank goodness) until I find a job or it’s the new year. I give in though sometimes to look at my dashboard and I keep on hearting things. It’s a habit I never want to kick. Wait yes I do, I get addicted to things easily and I would sit for hours just hearting, replying, and reblogging.

Felt so good though haha.

Plus I discover my favorite books there like The Lover’s Dictionary by David Levithan. which I found through Donald Glover’s tumblr. And I remember seeing cool exhibits like New Museum’s three story slide on my dash as well. So many authors and poets I found like Lang Leav, Adam Gnade, Nick Miller,  and Tyler Knott Gregson. I even found two awesome classes like Megan Falley‘s Poetry of New York Camp and PAWA’s Pinay Literature and Creative Writing Online Workshop that I took. SO recommend.

There’s just so many things to love about it. But then there’s the heart wrenching, infuriating posts I come across. They enlighten you and show you your privilege. That’s actually the place where I found out about privilege and more information about feminism, racism, and white supremacy. So many videos to laugh at like Peppa Pig. It’s like this amazing cauldron of wtf, omg, and me gusta. I HEART IT.

Withdrawal blows but at least I have this trusty blog right now. Originally I never wanted to get this personal. It was supposed to be documenting my creative endeavors. Sure my sketchbook for my soulmate is pretty intimate but I never intended to write entries solely on the guys in my life. Now they’re the majority of my posts I believe, or at least the most recent ones. Not sure if this is good or bad but it’ll stay until I conclude otherwise.

Sometimes I wonder if Bossy Bear or Fattie read this. Most likely not since I never told them this WordPress exists. And I think I’ll keep them out of the know. Sometimes, some feelings are not meant to be mentioned. Besides, one has a girlfriend and the other is thousands of miles away. What good would it do to share this? I never want to be a home wrecker and the other is still depressed over his ex (plus there’s NINE girls in the running for his heart possibly penis, holy fucking shit I do not stand a chance even if I was in Cali).

It’s better if I just focus on myself… and keep an eye out for a cutie hehe. I’m actually going to Comic Arts Brooklyn and the Festival of Lights tomorrow. Both are FREE. And I’m so pumped! I hope I don’t go spend crazy at CAB but I’m definitely getting Your Illustrated Guide to Becoming One with the Universe by Yumi Sakugawa for sure. Her comics are good shit. I should really limit myself to a handful of items. I’m still jobless so I have to be careful. Plus my room is loaded with all these unread zines and books.

I’ve been a bad bad girl lolol.

(NOTE: I wrote this entry 19 hours ago and just came back from both festivals. Sorry I didn’t let you guys know earlier. CAB was pretty cool and I spent maybe too much money on books but they’re all signed and I got this adorable bag. Sweet. Festival of lights was a bust though, it got cancelled just when me and my bro arrived. Too many people, ugh. I feel so bad since the whole reason why we went to Brooklyn was for that fest. Damn.)

I’m supposed to go to the gym with my bro right now, even though it’s 4:23 am. Looks like I’m not going. SCORE. I refuse to wake him up. It’s too cold and I’m too lazy but I’m wearing my gym clothes just in case he does wake up. Yup.

(NOTE: I ended up going around 5 and didn’t sweat which is no good for my weight loss. At least I’m being active, that’s a step up from the jackshit I did before lol)

ALSO. I came across this awesome looking game that I can play on my Kindle Fire! It’s called Steve Jackson’s Sorcery! and it’s a four part game with only the first two chapters out. It’s an epic magical adventure and you read it like an interactive story and there’s like thousands of choices you can make and it will rewrite the story once you made a decision. SO COOL.

In fact inkle studios is a pretty cool looking game developer, focusing on interactive stories. I love it. It’d be so neat to work and write for them. I’m sure I’d love it.

But until then, I can try my hand at writing a choose your own adventure story through their inklewriter website. It looks really easy to use and I can’t wait to think of one to write! You can even convert it to kindle and sell it. Too awesome. I’m definitely putting in my bucket list to complete an interactive story, I’ll just use the back haha.

…19 hours later…

Speaking of bucket list, I have yet to start my NaNoWriMo for this year and it’s already the 9th. I better type up something. I have this inkling of a guy who romanticizes like most if not all things but he doesn’t want to try things out for fear of ruining his ideal. And then he comes across a girl who shows him that the real thing is so much better. I’m worried that she’ll become a manic pixie dream girl. I want to avoid that and I think reading John green’s Paper Towns and his essay On the destruction of manic pixie dream girls. (http://johngreenbooks.com/on-the-destruction-of-manic-pixie-dream-girls/) always wanted to read his work.

More to say but I think this entry is long enough.

LATES.

October 26th 2011

NOTE: I was scouring the drafts of this website and found this gem. I completely forgot about all this and my characterization of my protagonists. I’m planning on doing NaNoWriMo again and I don’t think I’ll be using the same characters here, but who knows right?

---

 

“Your writing and speaking abilities are operating at a high level today. If you’ve been thinking about pursuing either of these avenues, starting now gives you an advantage toward attaining success. Make a start and get your ideas down on paper, however rough they may be.  The only downside is the stress that might result from the sudden stimulation.” – today’s Cancer horoscope.

Dude. So on point hehe. Happened last week as well, so weird. I was thinking about nanowrimo while vacuuming the Raconteur used bookstore. And I wanted to make a novel for sure with footnotes, different fonts, highlights, font colors, symbols, bold, strikethroughs, italics, underlines, and maybe I’ll discover even more hehe.

The next page will be some possible spoilers for my nanowrimo. I’m not sure if I’ll post it all up at a later date but maybe I will. So if you don’t want to read it, just go to the third page for a rundown of my day hehe.

Pages: Page 1, Page 2, Page 3

NaNoWriMo 2011

    Gliding his fingers across the surface, he lands a digit on a mountain chain, swirling and surrounding it like a snowstorm. He whispers its name “Caraballo” as he dances his way into the South China Sea. Drifting along an unseen current, Nathan sidles west around three continents before finally landing approximately where he lived: sometown, New Jersey, U.S.A..

    He hated his hometown, so bland and mediocre in his eyes. He wish to be somewhere less narrow, more brilliant. Less shallow, more significant.

    Nothing goes on here. Nothing of interest. Nothing important. He looks out his bedroom window and shakes his head and says “Nothing…”

 

 

He romanticizes things to the ideal degree but is such a cynic that he isn’t willing to try. Afraid of being let down. Just sticks with his maps and stamps and photos online. Never trying to venture out into the world or try study abroad. Just stuck in this strange juxtaposition of putting things on a pedestal but never wanting to look at it.

² Figure out a last name that’s utterly fitting and sounds just great.

³ Figure out what town he should live in. Not big though, small, a little rural probably. Do NJ. Maybe pick somewhere that isn’t that diverse but somewhat close to NYC. I think. Hmm.

⁴ From the vantage point of his second story window, he sees the pavement with two parked cars: a green minivan and a blue acura. There’s a tree trunk blocking the view of the license plate numbers, bare of leaves and only of branches, sprawling towards the sky of white. The grass is deadening, turning yellow and unnatural to its normal hue. Cracked and broken, the sidewalk is bumpy and needs to be fixed. A young woman on her yellow bike zooms by towards the left window frame and out of sight. Out of mind^a.

 

A = what the girl was thinking about while riding her bike. Make it the female protagonist. Making her way down the road towards the post office, she thinks something something something okay here we go: What would happen if I just take off and just leave this town? Would anyone miss me? Or just call dibs on my belongings? Would they even notice? Would there be a search party after a few days? A few weeks? Two months later?

<footnotes end>

This is the entirety of my NaNoWriMo of 2011. Not even 750 words. *sigh* I don’t know if I should try again, maybe I will, I can definitely hit 1000 words before the month’s end. I just wish I knew the plot of last year’s story. Where was I even going with it? I wish I took more notes down but oh well. So far what I pieced together was that he, Nathan, is a collector of all sorts of maps and he keeps things bottled in. And the girl would help him admit these feelings. Something like that. Hrm. It’s a shame, I bet it was something interesting, or at least could have been.

It’s been a day less than a year since I last updated this blog. A long time coming. I’m gonna resurrect this wordpress and try to write something at least once a week. That’s doable. I have a terrible habit of not finishing projects but I want to change that. I want to actually finish something. At least one damn thing before the year is out. I definitely think I can do that right?

Right.

eileen

One Note to Rule Them ALL!

Screen clipping taken: 11/7/2011, 6:17 PM

http://www.iwrotethisforyou.me/2007/08/hidden.html

Screen clipping taken: 11/7/2011, 6:31 PM

http://www.iwrotethisforyou.me/2007/09/fog.html

 

So I’ve been using One Note to write my Nanowrimo for 2011. It’s pretty neat. I’ve been toying with the idea of making a tumblr for the male main protagonist but now I think I’ll do one for the female one as well. I’m not sure if she’ll become his love interest though I like the idea of writing a love story but we’ll see.

Anyway the first one would be the point of view of the girl and the latter is what the male will learn. I really enjoy the I Wrote This For You site. Just a great collection of words and photography. I really want to get the book when it comes out in December. And I think this is a good jump off point for the both of them. As soon as I have some blogs on the tumblrs of the characters I’ll post up their sites as well. This is so exciting for me hehe.

And the good thing is that I didn’t have to pay additional for the One Note since it came with the student package. I should try out the other Microsoft Office Applications, they look cool too and I think it’ll definitely boost up my chances of getting a job. Or at least become a better writer.

I should also write an introduction maybe, or an about me for them. Or maybe I should just put up posts I think they’d make and then work it from there? Hmm.

In any case, I haven’t written a damn word for them and it’s been a week ugh. I’ll get around to it. I just need to apply to more jobs but in the mean time I can look at my dashboard casually for any relatable posts and keep on reading things I think they’d like to learn about. This is soo cool hehe.

I can’t wait to see what else I discover! I should get my own lap top though again. My other one broke and my cousin who’s amazing with computers couldn’t resurrect it. But it’s cool. I’ll just use the family computer and my sister’s lappy til then. I should also get a USB drive. I need to find where mine went. I really miss it.

Hope you haven’t lost anything! And try One Note! It’s soo neato!

eileen